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Howdy y'all to my forums! Sure, it's small, but hopefully it can grow. Ya don't need to be an animator, there's so much more to it than that I hope...

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2 posters

    Pokemon Fanfic: The Eight Stones

    MuddyMudkip
    MuddyMudkip


    Posts : 3
    Join date : 2011-05-11

    Pokemon Fanfic: The Eight Stones Empty Pokemon Fanfic: The Eight Stones

    Post  MuddyMudkip Thu May 12, 2011 9:05 am

    Hi!

    So here's a multi-chaptered Pokemon fanfic of mine. I posted this over at BMGf as well. Comments and Constructive Criticism is certainly welcome. Enjoy and happy reading! (This is the Prologue, by the way)

    ------------
    THE EIGHT STONES
    By MuddyMudkip

    ------------

    PROLOGUE: Fire

    It was a very bright and starry night that the stars cast shadows over a group. The wind blew frantically causing the leaves of the trees to rustle and sway with great urgency. The group of six people and their Pokemon were having some sort of meeting. They gathered in a circle-like shape, as they talked softly but vehemently. They hoped they would not be heard, as they were near a house.

    "He has gotten too close to succeeding," the deep, dark voice of a man stated. "He needs to be stopped."

    The man was muscular, strong and had light brown hair, he was almost as tall as the trees around him. He seemed to be in his late thirties. His Pokemon partner stood beside him, he had three sharp and long claws on each paw. The creature's appearance looks like that of a bluish-black bipedal feline, clad in a bright red crown, and collar. It had two tails, like any other Weavile. But, what made the battle-ready Weavile different from the others, was that it looked as thought it had been in one too many devastating battles with its numerous scratches and scars.

    "And he will be stopped. By all and any means necessary," a pure, and confident lady's voice replied, "even if he has to be crushed. He has gotten six stones already. It has to be done tonight."

    She was a beautiful lady with short blond hair, but that was only on the outside. On the inside, her heart was as hard as stone, her emotions as cold as ice. Her eyes were the color of water, where waves crashed and flowed with rage and fury-as if in a thunderstorm or hurricane. Earrings were dangling from her ear, and a diamond ring rested on her finger. She seemed to be in her mid-thirties, and wore a confident, yet smug, smile that spread across her face.

    Beside her was a dog-like Pokemon with short, black fur, who also had some scars and scratches, but the Weavile had more of those. He had a red underbelly and a long snout. The nose was dark in coloration, and sharp fangs protruded out of his mouth. There were two white bands around each of the creature's ankles, as well as three bands on his back. He had a long, skinny tail that ends in an arrowhead, and there were visible claws on his feet. The Dark Pokemon appeared to have a collar with a small skull pendant and a pair of curled horns, but no discernible ears. He growled energetically, it seemed as though the fire inside of him grew stronger and hotter.

    "Umm... Excuse me, ma'am," a muffled voice came out from a younger man, thin and short, with a fiery Pokémon that appeared to be consisting entirely of magma. It resembled a slug, with a pair of bright yellow eyes on short stalks and a small mouth. The Slugma looked at his master's leader with frightened yellow eyes--the expression exactly the same as that of his master.

    "What is it Shrively?" the woman snapped at him as she rolled her eyes impatiently at the newbie.

    Ryan Shrively nervously scratched his jet-black hair as he gulped and mumbled his reply, "Did you just say crush, as in injure or kill or murder?"

    Her eyes now showed anger and impatience, like it was on fire-but then, it always was; always had been after that incident... The man with light brown hair took over, as he saw his co-leader's angry mood.

    "Well, yes, Ryan. We have to stop him. You must learn to have no mercy," he said quite calmly. His eyes were glowing with rage, as he really wanted to hurt the opponent.

    "Now, enough with that chit-chat. Time to crush him," the lady commanded venomously with a slight hiss in her voice, "Houndoom, use Flamethrower!" She pointed purposefully at the two-story building. The Pokemon immediately obeyed. He opened his mouth wide, took a deep breath, and aimed for the building. An intense blast of fire came out, hitting the house directly. It was an angry sea of flame, it lashed in all directions, consuming the west side of the house quickly. The others nodded, they all issued their Pokemon to use fire attacks. All the attacks hit the house. Those were just back-ups for the flamethrower. Then the gang escaped quickly and quietly, hearing a fire detector's alarm go on.

    "Our house is on fire!" a woman, with long black hair, cried out, as she rushed into a small room. Her anxious voice rose over the alarm of the fire detector. She tripped over a few assortment of toys, and made her way towards a pair of beds, where her two children lay down, sleeping and coughing.

    "Wake up!" she screamed as she nudged her children frantically to wake. She gasped for breath as smoke and flames curled around her. Her children finally woke up, still coughing in the smoke and heat. The kids nodded nervously, they were scared. She picked her four year old son up, then pulled her daughter out.

    They ran through a familiar hallway, but now it was one of their worst nightmares to see it. It was filled with sparks and flames of red, orange, and yellow that lashed out to them hungrily. They heaved down through the stairs quickly, frightened looks on their faces. The hand rails felt hot, and parts of of the stairs were burning down. They were careful not to step on burned parts. The fire was getting bigger, and stronger. Frightened as they were, they tried their best to stay clam.

    As they got down, they went into a fairly small room. It was the study. A man was frantically searching for something among the books. He was the woman's husband, and had dark brown hair. He was quickly pulling out books, looking for something very important. His Pikachu was helping him look. He looked up at them.

    "Get the children out!" he called, in a commanding voice, to the mother. Then he resumed his search. The mother knew what he was looking for. She was upset, not the slightest bit angry. She knew she had to get her kids out.

    "Daddy!" his six year old girl called out to him. She held out her arms for him to take. The man stopped for a moment and looked at his daughter.

    "Sweety, go with mommy. And take care of your brother," he said calmly with a determined but hurt look, "Take this Pokemon with you. She'll protect you. And this other one is for your brother... Keep it for him." He gave her a Pokeball and a Greatball. Slowly, the girl took them.

    "When will I give the Pokeball to my brother?" she asked in a murmuring voice.

    "You will know when it is the right time. The Greatball contains your Pokemon, okay?"

    The mother nodded gravely as she pulled her daughter and son out of their house, into safety. They sat on the grass, under a tree. They watched helplessly as the red flames ate the house.

    Just then, a fire truck appeared. The firefighters quickly sprayed water on the burning building, the water pressure wasn't strong enough for the fire was spreading speedily. The children's mother ran back towards the house. She was just a few meters from the house, when the Pikachu ran out. A few seconds after that, the house burned down completely and collapsed into bits. That electric rodent had a very lucky escape.

    The firefighters stopped spraying water. They and the neighbors gasped, shocked and stunned at how a fire could have spread so quickly. The family paused from a moment of shock. Some of the neighbors' jaws dropped wide open as they looked at the collapsed house.

    "Oh, John." The lady sighed with grief as she "got over" her shock. She touched her chest sadly. Tears were already rolling uncontrollably down her cheeks. She picked up the Pikachu and slowly walked back to her children.

    "NO! Daddy!" the little girl cried as she saw the house go down. She hugged her confused little brother tightly, and looked up as their mother returned. Wet was the ground, as tears flowed downwards.

    A car drove up into their driveway, the window rolled down, a woman with glasses looked out.

    "Come on in," she called. "You can stay at my house for the time being." A necklace swayed as her head popped out of the window. An expensive type of watch was wrapped around her wrist as her hand gestured them inside.

    "Hello Aunt Julie," the little girl greeted, her voice sounding lost and uncertain without its usual cheery glow, as she climbed into the backseat of the car. She looked back towards their house, her green eyes flashed angrily... She wanted to scream... As the car pulled out of the driveway, she pressed her face and left hand, which soon curled into a fist, onto the car's window.

    "Bye, daddy," the girl mumbled sorrowfully as the Pokeball and Greatball rolled about in her hand and fell down. The Greatball's middle button was hit as the ball touched the floor of the car, causing it to enlarge.

    Hmm, why would daddy give me a ball that grows bigger and smaller? she thought to herself, having never seen her father battle. She picked up the ball, and suddenly a young mammalian-like creature with brown fur popped out. A brown, bushy tail, that had a cream-colored tip wagged back and forth playfully. It had a furry collar that is also cream-colored. Four short, feline-esque legs with three small toes on each foot helped it stand upright-barely, as the creature was quite young. The Evolution Pokemon had brown eyes, big ears, and pink paw pads.

    She looked at the other ball, wondering what was inside... And what secrets it held...

    ***Six Years Later***
    Late one afternoon, a man and a woman were in a room in a hotel sending invitations through e-mail. The room was not big, just the right size. The air conditioner was on, and it was a hot day.

    "It's time. They have to take the test now," the man suggested. He was in his late thirties and had blond hair. He looked up from his laptop and turned to the woman, an innocent face on him.

    "Yes. It is time," the woman replied. "Their father would want them to find the stones. They should be able to handle themselves now." She paced around, back and forth, while an amethyst earring dangled from her ear. She also wore a silver bracelet.

    "Hmm..." the man mumbled. He quickly typed in another e-mail address, then he clicked SEND.

    ~Fin~

    What do you think? Good? Bad? Average? Interesting? Does it make you want to read more? Etc. etc. Please comment and CnC!

    ~MuddyMudkip
    Godo-kun
    Godo-kun
    Admin


    Posts : 28
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    Pokemon Fanfic: The Eight Stones Empty Re: Pokemon Fanfic: The Eight Stones

    Post  Godo-kun Thu May 12, 2011 6:45 pm

    What do you think? Good? Bad? Average? Interesting? Does it make you want to read more? Etc. etc. Please comment and CnC!

    CnC?
    Anyhow, it's good, but the second part was short...
    MuddyMudkip
    MuddyMudkip


    Posts : 3
    Join date : 2011-05-11

    Pokemon Fanfic: The Eight Stones Empty Re: Pokemon Fanfic: The Eight Stones

    Post  MuddyMudkip Fri May 13, 2011 3:06 am

    Godo-kun wrote:
    What do you think? Good? Bad? Average? Interesting? Does it make you want to read more? Etc. etc. Please comment and CnC!

    CnC?
    Anyhow, it's good, but the second part was short...
    CnC is short for Constructive Criticism, apparently.

    The second part is short because the first chapter starts at around that time.

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